What Does Do You Like Kids Mean On A Hookup Site
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Sex
New research disproves a range of myths about sex.
Posted February 15, 2016 Reviewed by Ekua Hagan
Over the past decade, the media have published breathless—and often ominous—reports of young adults engaging in “hook-ups,” a supposedly new type of casual hyper-sex in quickie, promiscuous relationships. To read some of the coverage in Vanity Fair, Huffington Post, and the New York Times, one might think that hook-up apps propel every 18-to-30-year-old into bed with someone new almost every night.
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In fact, hooking up represents only a minor variation on what used to be called dating. I've reviewed the now-substantial research literature on hook-ups and discovered that the more the media (and some researchers) say that young adult sex has changed, the more it’s actually remained pretty much the same.
Is Hooking Up New and Different?
The media did not use the term “hook-up” in a sexual/relationship context until the late 1990s, and it did not spread widely until 2006.
Which raises a question: Did something change in young American sexuality during the first decade of the current century? To investigate, University of Portland researchers (Monto & Carey, 2014) analyzed data from the General Social Survey (GSS). The GSS, funded by the National Science Foundation since 1973, is the only in-depth, ongoing, national interview-based survey of American beliefs and behavior. The researchers compared GSS data from two periods:
- 1988-1996, before the Internet, Tinder, and smartphones—and before “hooking-up” had entered the lexicon.
- 2004-2012, when app-based hooking up became the rage.
Total Number of Sex Partners Among U.S. Young Adults Since Age 18
1988-96 2004-12
- 0: 10% 15%
- 1: 23% 23%
- 2: 16% 13%
- 3-5: 23% 24%
- 6-12: 20% 17%
- 13-20: 5% 5%
- 21+: 4% 3%
The only significant difference is that a larger proportion of today’s young adults are celibate (then 10%, now 15%). Otherwise, things are pretty much the same. The term 'hook-up' may be new, but as far as getting it on is concerned, bed-hopping appears almost identical. Today’s twenty-somethings are doing what today’s 45-year-olds did 20 years ago, and, as far as this 66-year-old can recall, what today’s retirees did 40 years ago.
How Sexual Are Hook-Ups?
Media reports imply that hook-ups involve intercourse. This is understandable for two reasons:
- The term conjures a hook-and-eye lock, with the hook inserted into the eye, or fishing with the hook penetrating the fish’s mouth. It’s only a small step from those images to another type of insertion.
- People tend to overestimate how much sex everyone else has. So again, it’s not much of a leap to assume that people engaged in this “new” form of casual sex are enjoying frequent intercourse.
In fact, recent studies (Fielder & Carey, 2010; Reiber & Garcia, 2010) show that hook-ups are less sexual than the media imply:
Activities During Most Recent Hook-Up:
- Kissing: 98%
- Fondling the woman’s breasts: 58%
- Hands on genitals: 53%
- Oral sex (provided and/or received): 36%
- Intercourse: 34%
Only half of hook-ups involved any genital play, and only one-third included intercourse. “Hooking up” has more to do with the casual nature of the relationship than how far things go. A study of Northeastern University students found similar results: 78% of students reported hook-ups, but only about a third of encounters included intercourse. These figures remind me of what I recall from my own casual relationships four decades ago.
What Does Do You Like Kids Mean On A Hookup Sites
How Do Hook-Up Partners Meet?
What Does Do You Like Kids Mean On A Hookup Site Images
From the 1970s through the 1990s, young adults interested in casual sex—or meeting long-term mates—often met at parties or singles bars. Canadian researchers (Herold & Mewhinney, 1993) confirmed this in a study of college students more than 20 years ago:
How They Met, 1993
- Party: 70%
- Bar: 56%
- Vacation: 43%
- Dance: 28%
- Business trip: 7%
- Blind Date: 5%
Here’s what New Jersey researchers (Paul & Hayes, 2002) found more recently in a survey of college student hook-ups:
What Does Do You Like Kids Mean On A Hookup Site Test
How They Met, 2002
- Party: 67%
- Semi-public location (dorm, frat house): 57%
- Homes or apartments: 35%
- Bars: 10%
- Cars: 4%